the akin defense

senate hopeful and gynecological expert todd akin (r-mo) certainly sounds like a another tea party twit today, but tomorrow, who knows?

because akin sounds like he's been reading the jane's defense weekly for female sexual self-defense — "aeon flux: the herodotus file" (1995):

(story by mark mars and eric singer, art by eric canete and peter chung)

the friendly skies

(photo by m. trombly)

stir crazy

nsfw, but srsly, wtfaydawosn?

richard pryor: i've always said the black man been fucked over, y'know: "the revolution ... muddafukkin whitey ... we gotta go to [unintelligible] ... nice people just gettina bad break" ... and i was there for six weeks [at arizona state prison filming "stir crazy" with gene wilder] and i talked to some of the brothers there ... [catches breath] ... thank god we got penitentiaries!

chris rock: if i had a choice right now between the electric chair or tossin' a salad, i'd be like: "so where ya plug it in?" "shouldn't i be wet?"

rick reynolds: eventually we're led into this big gymnasium, like your high school gym. four sets of bleachers pulled out, little stage in front of 'em. bleachers packed with about 800 pissed off guys in blue denim. as soon as they see us, it is like a scene from a bad prison movie. they started whistling and catcalling and yelling: "bend over!" "whoo-woo!" "fresh meat!" apparently it was mating season in prison.

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what the f*ck are you doing at work on sunday night?

in what respect, charlie?

guilty as sin but free as a bird, rapper r. kelly opines (in sep. 2008) on his taste in girls women and the justice system.

the interviewer's double-take when kelly asks "how old are you talkin'?" is priceless: it is the look of a man who realizes he's talking to, if not a complete moron, then a man who has failed to grasp the meaning of his predicament.

BET:	do you like teenage girls?
kelly:	[after a pause] when you say teenage, how old are you talkin'?
BET:	girls who are ... teenagers.
kelly:	19?
BET:	19 ... and younger.
kelly:	i have some 19-year-old friends ...

kelly:

if you was charged with something, and you were found innocent ... then you can't be found guilty, for being found innocent.

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franken fries flunkie: