birther vs. afterbirther

one more passing vignette in the ongoing struggle to stay ahead of the birthers ...

in this corner, art:

washington — in the continuing controversy surrounding the president's u.s. citizenship, a new fringe group informally known as "afterbirthers" demanded monday the authentication of barack obama's placenta from his time inside his mother's womb. "all we are asking is that the president produce a sample of his fetal membranes and vessels — preferably along with a photo of the crowning and delivery — and this will all be over," said former presidential candidate and afterbirthers spokesman alan keyes, later adding that his organization would be willing to settle for a half-liter of maternal cord plasma. "to this day, the american people have not seen a cervical mucus plug, let alone one that has been signed and notarized by a state-certified hawaiian health official. if the president was indeed born in the manner in which he claims, then where is his gestation sac?" keyes said that if obama did not soon produce at least a bloody bedsheet from his conception, afterbirthers would push forward with efforts to exhume the president's deceased mother and inspect the corpse's pelvic bone and birth canal.

and nipping at its heels, from the opposite corner, life:

and why are you still on the birth certificate? it's moved past that. i don't actually believe barry sr is barry jr's father. if you look at pix after pix of the two together there is not one facial feature in common between them. not one. and i am certain the forensic skull overlap will/has already proven that. and barry left plenty of utensils and glasses to obtain his DNA from, which as you know, counselor, is perfectly legal if obtained in a public place – even for the POTUS. what you may not know is DNA can be tested from folks of "african" descent and the location in africa from whence their ancestors arose — sometimes down to the exact tribe (i imagine even the luo) — can be determined. they certainly have no trouble determining if the DNA is of east african or west african origin. and the testing can be accomplished in complete anonymity without need of comparison from a relative. what is more gold standard than a birth certificate? DNA.