queen bee

the first lady of birfistan, orly taitz, in all her unfettered glory, fluttering down from the clouds to enlighten the masses to our grave constitutional crisis, in a call-in interview on WKGO radio (northern ca):

update: the gift that keeps on giving, primetime edition ...

this is the end, beautiful friend

when you've lost bill o'reilly ...

alright, more economic choas today ... don't panic! uh, it'll, uh, flip around, but, uh, this is the end of president bush’s legacy. that's — he's done, he’s through. ... um, y'know, i like president bush personally, i think he's done some good things in the war on terror, but he will now go down in history, alongside jimmy carter, as a, uh, ineffectual leader, particularly with the last four years in iraq, and now the economy just imploding. and i’ll tell you the reason why, it's, it’s poor leadership on his part, and the people that he picked, uh, to run certain things have been disastrous. and no leadership and now americans are getting, getting hurt. and it's my job to, uh, put an end to that, and i'll do the best i can. we'll start today ...

it's true — if you've got no leadership skills and you can't even choose the right people to delegate to, what else is there to being president? charm? well, let's not go there, folks ...

so welcome aboard, billo, but this bus left the station seven years ago.

silly scientists

it's always so quaint to hear how they waste their time, with their so-called "experiments" and their toys, when they really needn't ever bother ...

... then someone in florence, italy tried to pump water from a deep well, but couldn't do it. they discovered that no suction pump could raise water higher than 32 feet. galileo noticed this and suggested that his pupil, torricelli, investigate it. well, the young scientist thought a long time about it and finally decided to use mercury for his experiment. since it was 13 times heavier than water, he calculated that if atmospheric pressure really existed, the mercury would rise about 30 inches in a glass tube from which the air had been expelled. well, filling a 4 foot glass tube of mercury, then inverting it in a half-filled flask, torricelli removed his thumb from the tube. with mounting excitement he watches the mercury fell from the tube, then after a few oscillations caused by momentum, the column settled at a height between ... guess how much ... ? 29 and 30 inches. yet, if men had only noticed carefully a passage from job, they would've already known that air has weight. you mean the bible talks about it? of course! [chuckling] job, the 28th chapter, beginning with verse 23: 23god understandeth the way thereof, and he knoweth the place thereof. 24for he looketh to the ends of the earth, and seeth under the whole heaven; 25to make the weight for the winds; and he weigheth the waters by measure. there it is! what a mighty creator god we have, friend. — h.m.s. richards, jr., the voice of prophecy