romney's new pitch?

with his once all-but-assured nomination now severely in jeopardy, how can squishy mitt romney hope to steal the hearts of GOP voters away from ultra-hardcore social conservative rick santorum?

(from "heavy metal: the movie", 1981)

wow! hard to find a more hardcore campaign slogan than that! i can already hear the applause ...

love story

as an ice age crept upon them thousands of years ago, neanderthals and modern human ancestors expanded their territory ranges across asia and europe to adapt to the changing environment. in the process, they encountered each other.

although many anthropologists believe that modern humans ancestors "wiped out" neanderthals, it's more likely that neanderthals were integrated into the human gene pool thousands of years ago during the upper pleistocene era as cultural and climatic forces brought the two groups together, said arizona state university professor c. michael barton of the center for social dynamics and complexity and school of human evolution and social change.

(art by gary larson)

from hero to zero ... once more with feeling

on january 20 birthers found a savior in georgia deputy administrative judge michael malihi, who rebuffed obama's lawyers' attempt to quash their "subpoenas" and who invited all to make their cases in open court. it was not the first time birthers thought a true liberator had come:

"god willing nobody gets to this judge, as they did with judge carter."
— orly taitz, co-counsel for the plaintiffs (malware alert!)

"LOL. the chances of [obama] showing are nil but i admire this judge."
— paul51

"i think it is turning out that an honest judge is the biggest problem for obama. that, and his hubris."
— pa-river

"pray for him. with god's help, this will cause a tidal wave to sweep obama out."
— pray4liberty

"the good people of GA need to find and fund professional personal security folks to insure this judge does not fall victim to an "accident" or other means of demise...."
— manly warrior

"god bless the great state of georgia! this is one judge that intends to uphold his sworn oath to protect and defend the constitution of the united states of america."
— godebert

"OH *U** YEAH!

oh I LIKE this judge! he is following the LAW!!!! who knew! RIGHT ON!!!!!!!!!!!!!! oh it's a good friday now, even if i don't have my chemistry homework done!!! WOOT!!!!!"
— danae

"gingrich/mahili 2012."
— churchillspirit

"i am beginning to wonder if this judge mahili may just go down in history as one of the many people who saved this great republic."
— nesnah

a week later on january 26 birther fortunes only soared higher when obama's team boycotted the hearing; the cowardly usurper had ceded the field, both legally and morally, to america's protectors:

"we have won our case. the judge is going to declare a default judgement against obama."
— david farrar, plaintiff

"now we're merely awaiting the publishing of this judge's ruling which, as previously stated, will be a default judgment.

in other words ... we won."
— carl swensson, witness for the plaintiffs

"the "birthers," who have been ridiculed if not ignored by the media and much of the american public for the past three years, have officially been vindicated today."
— floyd brown

"bring it to 'em, judge malihi!"
— backwoods-engineer

"i grilled steaks tonight and we're getting ready to eat pineapple cream pie and coconut cream pie here at our house — to celebrate that there is still apparently one honest judge in the country.

wish i could treat all my fellow patriots here."
— butterdezillion

"georgia does not play!!!! finally a judge with courage!"
— julie

"not showing up makes the judge's job real easy... facts/evidence is undisputed. bamm! (gavel cracking judge's bench)"
— freepersup

"remember to pray for this judge, he has a lot of eyes looking at him and weighing a judgment in this case is going to be a heavy decision."
— an american!

"lord, give the judge and the SOS the courage to do the right thing and keep this miserable spawn of hate off the georgia ballot."
— enterprise

cruelly, even unfettered and unopposed testimony on the record in open court proved insufficient to keep afloat their savior, who delivered his judgment on february 3:

"this behavior of judge malihi was so outrageous, that not only his advisory opinion needs to be set aside, as not grounded in any fact or law, but state and county grand juries and the attorney general of georgia need to launch a criminal investigation into actions of judge malihi ..."
— orly taitz, co-counsel for the plaintiffs (malware alert!)

"the question remains, who got to him or was his mind already made up before the hearing. his ruling is NOT written in his usual style and the ankeny case he cited was provided by someone. who, we may never know but FOGBOW and or perkins cole are the prime candidates."
— carl swensson, witness for the plaintiffs

"i guess bath-house barry could walk into this bastard's court, piss in his face and malihi would just apologize for not helping barry lower his pants."
— mortrey

"UNBELIEVABLE! THE VERDICT IS IN! THERE ARE ZERO GOVERNMENT MEMBERS WITH INTEGRITY."
— anonymous

"TRAITORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR"
— kenyanBornObamAcorn

"may he die in his sleep tonight, and all other traitors of the USA"
— margie urban

"all of this is not surprising that the "evil ones" would place a muslim judge to again squash any dealings in a court of law. the "evil ones" planted a seed of hope for us folks that possibly, just possibly, there might be a person of character and a noble and honest judge who would find the answers. then they dashed everything, as part of the plan to again destroy any evidence."
— betsy

"i believe the judge was threatened. most of these people in bench positions, have gotten cushy in their lives, and have "strange skeletons" in their closets. some skeletons they would rather sell america up the road than have exposed. ...then remember that 2 of the supremes are o appointed. and of course, roberts is tainted, having sworn the "illegally sitting resident" into our whitehouse. i am praying hard for our military, and hope they will step in."
— true patriots, navy vet

"i suspect this ruling was not written by judge milihi. ... in his final ruling he makes several constructed opinions based on assumptions ... completely contrary to what he wrote several days earlier. i swear this ain't the same person"
— p5151

"that is what happened in the california case with judge carter. remember the bauer law firm in seattle sent a law clerk down to work for carter and then the case went south from there. i wonder who wrote judge malihi's so called decision."
— iontheball

"that really sucks that the judge caved. i guess the chicago muslim mafia convinced him that was the best way to keep himself and his family breathing."
— hm

"it is a significant number of cowards who fear to stand up to power. the fix is in, IMHO. its gonna take some stones to do the right thing. Beyond the every day set of stones that is. we have not seen a judge with a set yet."
— danae

"just saw the ruling from malihi. there is no other rational explanation than the obama thugs got to him or he saw the gravitas of his decision and he HID HIMSELF like a frightened child."
— dr. david earl-graef (malware alert!)

""we" were defeated because a craven judge decided he would like to live to see his children and grandchildren grow up."
— hinckley buzzard

"judges are the most pusillanimous and obsequious of the entire political class. you will not find a courageous judge, it is essentially an oxymoron."
— hinckley buzzard

"he is iranian for sure. i have somewhere a printout of his background info. his parents names, last names, all iranian

god knows, what kind of a deal was done there

... this judge belongs in prison in the best caes scenario, he should be sharing a cell with obama"
— orly taitz, co-counsel for the plaintiffs (malware alert!)

"well, what scares me is what's coming in november. now that we know that judges can't be trusted to support and defend the constitution, i'm betting that we'll see a very strong showing by the republican nominee (probably mitt romney) and that somehow, the courts will deny him the presidency. once that happens, obama will be in complete control and the increasingly rapid strangulation of our once free country will commence. i foresee that this november will probably be our last free election—unless the bravery of real americans waters the tree of tyranny with the blood of traitors. i haven't fired a weapon since 1974—i came back from viet nam sick of violence (hell, i just a medic), but this bullsh*t makes me so angry i'm going out tonight to cabelas to see what they've got in the way of a nice warm rifle. it's clobbering time!"
— ralph swain

"in the interest of public safety i would like to request of all who are aware of this stinking rotten judge's actions, to please refrain from mugging the low down lying cockroach, throwing rocks at this dog's house, slapping this treasonous corrupt scoundrel's children, spitting on this disgusting animal's wife, to just go directly to the whorse's mouth. give him a call or stop in to see him, for a polite civilized discussion, on why he chose to turn his back on the country that provided the means for him to be in the position he is in.

i am sure that he would want to hear from the people who pay his salary, who put food in his family's stomachs and puts clothes on their backs. naturally, he would want to thank you personally.

for conversing, socializing, bonding with his neighbors and undermining the american legal system, he lists his address as: [redacted]

or, people always love a good fax
why not? he faxed us good."
— mark mcgrew

but let's not judge the judge too harshly, folks:

"all through the past three years there have been judicial decisions wrought with errors ... like breadcrumbs along a trail. one suspects the decisions to have been done purposefully in an effort to propel this issue to SCOTUS."
— satinDoll

see? these so-called traitor judges are really just helping birthers — if the lower courts ever let them win a case, the issue would never make it to the supreme court! just a matter of keeping their powder dry for them ...

(photoSnark via verbalobe)

see also:

"from hero to zero"
"certifigate: from hero to zero, in under 60"